where elle is exploring

Tuesday, September 16, 2008

Bye Apo

theelleswhere 10:51:00 AM 1 Comments

Time quickly flew... and then you're gone.
You will always be in our hearts, a part of our lives.
Bye Apo...

# Mumblings

Saturday, September 6, 2008

Thoughts

theelleswhere 10:42:00 AM 0 Comments

I seldom go to hospitals. Aside from the girlfriend-giving-birth occasions, I never do. I hate the place.

But in one day, I have been in 2 hospitals and I had no choice.

First, for my mom’s eye operation. The procedure was simple enough. We actually waited for just an hour and a half for her treatment. But the experience, right there in the waiting room, is something I would not forget.

I was anxious, not for my Mom, as I know she will be fine. The Lord told me so. But for the others. I see patients getting wheeled in, sedated. While their family looks on, and couldn’t do anything as they are not allowed inside the OR. The whispered consultations with the doctors… The atmosphere that was so thick with worry… Eyes staring at the white wall… No, I don’t want to have to go through what they were going through right then.

I want to get out. But I was forced to sit there and wait, only prayers in my head.

Finally we’re done. After a few hours of making sure my Mom eats and takes her medicine, off we go again to another hospital.

This time it was doubly hard. My Mom did not know that my Aunt rushed Apo, her father last night. We couldn’t afford to tell her as it might affect her BP, and consequently her operation.

So we kept silent. Until the moment we had to tell her.

In Apo’s room, I couldn’t bear to look. It seems like a scene from a movie with tubes on his nose as he tries hard to breathe. But this time it is different. This is the face I love, the face that filled my childhood memories. And he is lying there helpless. And I could not do anything.

My eyes filled with unshed tears but I did not cry. I needed to be strong. I had to watch out for my Mom, check her BP, as well as the rest of my aunts there.

And this time, I don’t want to leave the hospital. I wished I could have stayed and watch for Apo. I wished I could have given more of my time for my Aunts who still had no sleep.

But we need to leave. I have to bring Mom home, make sure she does everything the doctor asked her to do.

I wish I could be in 2 places at the same time. But I could not…

Hospitals, I still hate the place. But I wish I am there right now.

# Mumblings

Tuesday, September 2, 2008

Jeckyll and Hyde

theelleswhere 6:14:00 PM 0 Comments

Did this weeks ago. I debated whether to post this or not.
I decided just a few moments ago. Bakit nga naman hindi.

A snake
In the guise of a dove
A savior
But you crucify us all

You had everyone fooled
With your words and wit
But behind lies sarcasm
A plot to destroy the weak.

We don't really know you
We denounce your very essence
The place should be purged
Of any memories of you.

© eleanor esteban

# Mumblings

Saturday, August 30, 2008

Bravo!

theelleswhere 4:09:00 AM 0 Comments

Our usual Friday nights are often mysterious and spontaneous (meaning: we have no real plans except find a restaurant with ample parking space). Our grumbling stomachs took us to Bravo, an Italian restaurant along HV Dela Costa, Salcedo Village.

It is not fine dining but it "attempts" to be with its wine bottle per table (which they quickly remove as soon as you sit down, without giving you any time to even read the label). The lights are not dim enough and the chairs are your typical fastfood-type ones. But the place can pass off as the usual semi-dating place. You know, the place where you go when there is no real commitment yet in the relationship and you're trying to explore if there can be something.

There are not so many people when we went there, just another group finishing a bottle of wine.

Anyway, the food was a delight (from my untrained Italian palate anyway)!

We had Bravo pizza, solo size, which is actually 8 pieces fitting the usual dinner plate. Their description was "paper thin" and it was apt. The thin crust was crunchy and the toppings tasty. It combines sausages with bits of onions and lots of cheese.

The pasta I ordered was named Gnocchi Boscaiola which is actually Italian sausage, mushroom in creamy tomato sauce. The sauce was "normal". What i actually liked was the pasta. It was not the usual spaghetti or penne. It was actually my first time to taste that kind of pasta (again, pardon my untrained Italian palate).

The pasta itself was tube-liked and the "tube" is filled. The way it was cooked was just right and it made me really taste the pasta itself, even without the sauce.

The house red wine that accompanied our meal was dry but it quite fit the meal we were having.

Our pizza and pasta, combined with red wine and the quiet place, with its bossa and oldies background music, made us linger more on our dinner. This is seldom, I must say. I usually eat and run. But the meal, and the ambience, made me want to sit back and relax and talk about almost anything under the sun.

I sure plan to go back and try again their other dishes, another fave restaurant in the making!

Wikipedia - Gnocchi (pronounced [ˈɲɔːki] in Italian; singular gnocco) is the Italian name for a variety of thick, soft noodle or dumpling. They may be made frompotato, semolina, ordinary wheat flour, bread crumbs, or other ingredients. Outside Italy, "gnocci" generally refers specifically to the kind made from potato, and with uniform shape. The irregular kind, regardless of ingredients, is known by numerous other names, including halušky and spätzle. (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gnocchi)

# Bravo # food

Wednesday, August 27, 2008

A day of remembering

theelleswhere 7:59:00 AM 2 Comments

I w

I was not consciously thinking of it. But when we got stuck in traffic after dropping off a colleague, we decided to eat at Forum. It was one of those spur-of-the-moment decision. I didn't know that the stop-over decision will bring me back down memory lane.

Saw 2 friend who I lost touch for years! About 6 to be exact. How time flew.

We spent the hour catching up on the old group, talking about what we did before, all those trips and the escapades in the provinces!

They talked about an overnight trip in Batangas / tagaytay and I couldn't even remember! Haha!

Oyit and Grace promised to send me pictures from the old time. I sure hope they would soon.

Sigh. Bilis talaga ng panahon. Gone are the days when I would just think of gimiks, and the next province to be conquered. Life is really more serious now. I am really maturing :P

But what the heck. Those days were one of the greatest I have experienced so far in this lifetime.

So when I got home, I looked for our 'evidence' of the past and I am attaching it here. Note. These were taken 7 years ago ha. And I didn't have a digicam then so I just took pictures of the actual photos.

Go down memory lane with me with these few choice pics.

PS. Can youo guess who was drinking with us in the last pic? 😆

# Captured # John Lloyd

Thursday, July 31, 2008

Unite

theelleswhere 8:07:00 AM 0 Comments

And so I was called forth. But I am not part of this. Not in this circle. I was always in the peripherals. But these... these are aliens with centuries behind them. While I am but a human struggling with living.

And there I was. Smiling hesitantly while they chatted, their voices droning on and on, speaking in an ancient language I cannot fathom. Topics and experiences I am not aware of, nor could not imagine.

Everyone knew the other. And I felt conspicuous. I dont belong. The alien beside me smiled and introduced herself. I attempted a reply. But perhaps she noticed the youth? The inexperience? Or the insiginificance? Our conversation faltered and there was no more to say.

I should know what they are, should understand. I may become like them in my distant future. Or perhaps not. I am not even sure I want that.

And so I stayed. Tortured in my chair. Concentrated on what I was sent to do. I will get everything that I can soak in. Unnoticed.

# Mumblings # toil

Tuesday, July 29, 2008

Twilight

theelleswhere 12:56:00 AM 0 Comments

I can’t remember finishing books that fast! (Discounting of course those times in high school when I would finish one Mills and Boon in 3 hours. Well of course I have more free time then).
The Twilight Saga by Stephenie Meyer grabbed hold of me and gave me enough time to read again the select portions in just 3 days! I can’t remember any other book that has held me like this.
Maybe it is due to Edward… and Jacob. No such strong feelings for Bella especially in the third book Eclipse. Or maybe because I am a girl (haha!)
Edward… I don’t think there is someone like him in real life. Well of course he is a vampire. But the way he said things, the way he acted around her…. (getting mushy now)
I can’t wait for the movie. I can’t wait for the fourth book!

# Midnight sun # Mumblings

Monday, July 28, 2008

Awakening

theelleswhere 7:22:00 PM 0 Comments

I never thought about it. I am young. My life stretches in front me, filling me with excitement of the unknown and all my plans for the future. My life is filled with hope for all the things that I can do and what life can offer me.

And then it jolted me awake. Life is fragile. Life is precious. I should not dream, instead I should act. I am not as invincible as I thought I was. The young can also be affected.

It takes a friend, who is as invincible as I am, to make me realize. And now she needs to cope, while I stand helpless, and pretend that everything is okay. Pretend everything is a joke when we both know that it is serious…when we make fun of things….when all I can do is pray for her and not show how affected I am.

And it gives me a different perspective on things… Everything around here is meaningless. These are just tools so I can live. I was wrong to make it my life.

My real life is out there, and not behind these four walls. I don’t have to be here every time. What matters are those that I have neglected for far so long. I should be there, where my real life awaits. Where I should live with everything and everyone that matters…

I will live again.

# Mumblings

Sunday, June 1, 2008

Cotton, the first alpha

theelleswhere 1:10:00 AM

Cotton, born on December 24, 2007 is half poodle-half spitz. He got his looks from his father and his height from his mother, Bonita the poodle.

The spoiled one during his puppy days as he was the only baby in the house.