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Ultrasound #2

My spotting returned on April 3. Despite my positivism, I texted my boss and our HR that I would no longer be coming in, that I would start my bed rest one day early.

I went to the sonologist alone this time. 

She estimated that I was about 5 weeks (my result came at 5 weeks and 6/7 days), and asked me if I have heard the heartbeat. She tried however no heart beat can be detected yet. She informed me that usually they wait for 1 to 2 weeks. If I had my UTS done that Friday, I would have probably hear it. 

The following day, I got my results and sent it to my OB as per her request. She seem unworried and informed me to just repeat the procedure after a week or two. 

My spotting, however continued and she advised me to just continue with my 3x a day Duphaston. 

I tried to enjoy my bed rest, which was really in front of my computer answering emails and telecons on projects, Still like being in the office without the meetings. 

My spotting continues and I was already contemplating to using pads instead of shields. I kept praying for it to stop. 

After church on April 7, however, another fear came in: my spotting turned to heavy bleeding, I stared and could not believe my eyes. 

I could not tell Jie. Telling him would be like acknowledging something awful. My OB was not available that day so I kept everything to myself. 

When I came home, I went to the bed room and tried to rest. 

I googled and tried to find any information that would alleviate my fear. The more I learn, the more I fear.